hmm?

you know... I wonder. All the hardship people have gone through. Will they think it is a painful memory or will they think about the people who were with them through that hardship? Maybe they are never alone, it's just that they don't know that there is someone for them. Hee hee.... Strange ain't it?

friday the last orientation day

Hmmm... yesterday was quite ok. I think I took the critism too seriously because I was dreading that presentation. Anyway, it was over and gone with.

So, there is going to be a major project coming up on Monday. I feel a little worried and nervous but a little curious of what is going to come up. I hope that I can be the best I can. Hopefully, I can do a good job in it.

Not much happened yesterday really. Just went to someone's house and watch a rented movie. Then I went to teakuando. Man... my foundation sucks. But at least I know what to improve.

I met a MI friend that day. Such a surprise! Didn't see him for about five months. Actually, he wanted to quit MI and go to poly too. Okay... I think that's about it.

God bless! Mata ja!

presentation

Believe me.... there's something about thursday that turned against us. Let's just say that we had to present 27 "sexy" photos from boat quay through an exihibit. So we decided to make an upside down dining table. Later, we found out that the lecturers will be criticising the exihibitions and we need a concept. So my mind just came up with one.

Problem is my presentation skills. Boy, was the comments painful in every tiny bit of it. Try imagine having your emotional brain knocked against something hard. The pain will come later in full force when you get your mind back.Yet, it is for my own good, so just have to make use of this constructive critism and turn them into my benefit.

Hahaha... But i am really thankful that my group mates were there to help me. I need to thank a group mate for helping me put, his nick name is jonny tanner. So thanks, I am really touched cuz I know how nervous you are.

And thank you to those people who said I am doing good. It is really comforting and it did lessen the pain. So thanks!

Argh! Tomorrow another presentation. Better prepare...Wish me all the best. I really really need it.

god bless! Mata ja!

red paint

Man... Am I shagged... came back at 10pm. Hahaha... actually today is quite zany. The lecturers gave us a task and that is to paint without thinking. So, full of zest, everyone went painting, splinkling, splashing and splating around onto a huge canvas (actually it's just newspaper on the floor). Some took the delight of painting not only the canvas, but another type of canvas as well also known as the human skin. And then someone full of zest, created a zany act and yup, the paint had became a trade mark. You know, I learnt something today, if you know that you are painting the next day, NEVER do medicure. It will just make you cry.

Want to know why am I using the words that have a Z more often today? That is because it is the word of the day.

Anyway, Tekuando is tough, It's quite fun actually. But I think I am going to have cramps the next day.... Can't believe I did back trust and 360 degrees kick all in the same day.. It's my first time... Oh well.. that's about it. Nice zany day..

God bless! mata ja!

mostly mirror mask

Today is the first day we had a proper class (I said a which means just 1) which is theory of design. It does open my eyes a little because somehow my eyes had been opened that I need some aspects to become a good designer. Like instead of looking at an object with just one angle, I can look at it at many angles and find something different about it.

Later, we had to join back to our last week’s group and find out more about Zaha Hadid. All of us thought that the person is a male but it turned out to be a woman. And truly, she is one great architect who can make her works stand out remarkably!

Most of our time is spend watching Mirror Mask. Well… It is really mundane at the start. However, the longer we watched the more interesting it becomes.
Here’s the synopsis:

Helena, portrayed by Stephanie Leonidas, is the story's protagonist. The young circus performer and aspiring artist dreams of running away to join 'real life'. Despite these feelings, Helena loves both of her parents although she spends more time with her dad in the movie. In one circus skit they juggle and then have her mother come out in a gorilla suit. After a fight with her mother, in which Helena wishes she could 'be the death' of her, her mother falls ill, possibly from a brain tumour. Helena blames herself for the illness. On the night doctors operate on her mother, Helena dreams, or thinks she dreams, of a mysterious world of masked people and monsters.


My view:
What’s really interesting about the movie is that the masked people kind of represents her surroundings as people in the circus wear masks. It also showed that in her dream world, she is the only one who dares to show her true self.


You know you have imagination, but can you imagine what your imagination looks like? That show somehow did that by mixing what Helena see in everyday’s life into a funny mixture of things. Like a human face on a cat body with wings. That’s the beauty of imagination.


Another thing about the show is, you can realise not everything good is all good. There can be such things as greed to overcome good intentions at times. But there are also times where people realise the folly of their action and will do anything to fix it back.

There's also a wonderful contrast in behavior. The dark and good side of a person. How we can turn from one person to another really depends on ourselves usually or it can be the reaction to one's treatment.

The bad thing about the show, there can be a wonderful picture of helena’s imagination may look like. But the colours, all I saw is green green and green. I mean it is quite painful to the eyes. I mean, there should be a least a bit of colour right?


Hahaha… That’s all I have to say for now. Couldn’t believe my content is so long.


Mata ja!

week

ok! It's been a really fun week. I shall summaries it now.



Monday: Get to know each other + face painting = fun but also sian. Getting to know each other was well... fun... i think. I mean i got to know alot of people but my human scavenger sheet is quite empty (in other words, miserable). And who knew feb babies are so hard to find! Anyway, after that, we had to face paint each other and do a skit. I suggested doing adam's family because the make up is simple and the show is funny. Are we funny? Why sure! The results is people just stared dumbfounded and did I mention the soft "hmm?" that was getting loudly obvious. I guess the part I enjoyed was to laugh at some people's reaction when I painted their face.



Tuesday: Have to make an exhibition. Our group members divdied ourselves from 9 to 3 and we went looking around for items. So three of us went and most of the stuff we took was quite free. ( I am not sure about the beer bottles though, one of the workers is not very happy) And then, we made the poor and only guy of our group to carry a really 'feathered light" stone. By the time we came back to the campus, he is a walking traffic light (not to mention a tiring one).

So we decided to make a boat and a island. Results? The boat is recognizable but I swore that the small tiny island looked nicer than the large boat. Oh well, at least it's done.



wednesday: Have to go to boat quay to do 5 sketches from 9 to 1:30. 1 elevational view of the street scape, 2 3D drawings of a building and 2 zoomed in details are needed to be done by 1:30. 5 drawings + 4 and 1/2 hours= 3/4 of a drawing T.T. It's really pathetic la. what's more is that the sky decide to rain on us halfway. After tolerating it for a while, our drawings are getting soggy and we had to get back. At least the lecturers didn't say anything.



Thursday: Make 4 outfits out of garbage bags, newspaper and the works. I helped a friend with his shirt the whole afternoon and what the shirt gave us? A tear that was really big. So fuming and frustrated, we turned it into a jacket and we brought home the works to make another shirt. The other group members made a really nice dress, blouse and short pants. Really cool to look at them.



Friday: Man. that day was really fun. Our models actually strut down the runway showig off the outfits we made. The other groups were not bad. Check out the catwork. Cool! Remember the stupid shirt cum jacket we made? It tore! Good thing that guy made another shirt. We just made another jacket out of it. What's really cool is when people cheered when he took off the jacket while walking of the runway. That was so cool! Anyway, everybody were really sporty and It was really a great time. Ok. Here's the pics!

* extreme left is the runway and this are our great models on the runway!

the week

The week is really cool with dudes and dudettes. We did a lot of hand on things which I did not do in almost a lifetime(which is when I was very young). Honestly, I didn't expect how...um... unique this week turn out to be. But I think I will leave that for tmw to tell. So talk to ya soon!

well... so let's say it's a new beggining

Well... so let's say it's a new beginnig. But first, before I start on that, I have to say my grandma (nai nai) has went on to a new journey out of this world. To be honest, it does affect me but not too much. After seeing her with tubes and bedridden for the past few years, it's really heartwenching enough. I still remember the first time I saw her, I almost cryed. But now, she don't have to suffer anymore. From what I had learned recently, actually nai nai really loves me a lot. My uncles and aunties told me how she always talked about me. I guess in some part of me, there's regret, because I could have done something really nice for her and see her smile for that one special time. But generally, I am really happy that she don't have to suffer anymore and she had gone to a much better place. God bless nai nai and may she rest in peace.

Ok... so now, the decision is decided. I will be studying interior design. Maybe it will be fun. I don't know. I guess just somehow, I don't know where I stand anymore. But I have to make sure that I change to see the otside world. Maybe there's something beautiful in it. I have to see for myself.

To be honest, I don't know why, but some part in my heart, I feel happy that I left MI. But some small part in me, do miss it. Why am I such a complex person? I feel a little dot dot.

Anyway, I hope Jamie will be able to get what she wants. She is really nice, being there for me when I need someone to talk to even when she hs her own problems. I wouldn't mind if I can do something for her if I can help her out.

Anyway, That's about it for now. Mata Ja. Ciao!

poly.... O.O

Hey! It’s been a while since I have written an entry. I guess I didn’t have much time. Now I do have a teeny bit of time. So I should write my very complicated feelings down. I dun think I will continue in MI. Most likely I will be going to polytechnic. What I fear most is that I make the wrong choice or getting the choice that may not be to my desire. I guess early childhood is more of me than mass com… can you believe that? Friends who had been close to me will be missed dearly. Still, this route may be better for me. Now all I want to do is become a better person and focus on the life that is set forth of me. I leave these things in God’s hand. Hope this turns out ok.

tired..... emotionally

Although I may be relieved to stay in school, but really, sometimes, I feel like just throwing in that towel. But to do that, I am giving up without a fight. There is only failure if no attempt is made. But I am so tired. Really.... I feel stressed, I feel miserable like an awful fool. Like what the ***. Things that I had done, is not good enough. I hate being in the special attention of any teacher's eye. I hate being brought into view most of the time. It is not really about my self esteem, but I really can do without that too much extra attention. ARGH!

Still.... I can't give up yet. I mustn't. I got the potential. I know I do. I can't ruin this chance. It's up to them to see it. As for now, there's only one person I got to prove....................................me...

-.-

Today= ok day. Believe me, I have worst days than this. School homework is really inspriring and the lessons are oh so exciting. The best part is that I will usually agree with the teachers just by nodding my head off. Feeling a bit like a crank granny now, with the urge just to get comfortable with my bed, pillow and teddy bear. If this continues or if I don't change my schedule, I think my mental age will increase by another 10 years times. Anyway, got to go. I will try to find some detail about my aspiring life to tell you.

I thought maybe i should write about my life a bit

Hmmm…. Ok… so everything is same old same old. Not much of the oh-so-thrilling exciting life. It’s simple. I think… I mean excluding my jaw being locked and I have to go for operation and my common tests are coming up, it’s simple. Really! Anyway, I had General Paper presentation today. How was it? Did it go like a breeze? Why, of course! I just stammer through my part and so called choked it. Hahaha… I know I am sarcastic here; it’s just nice you know. Makes you look on the bright side. Anyway, I got to go. Seeya!

teh new updated blog

Ok….. So this is not me. But who cares! This is so kawaii! Apparently, I have been ignoring this blog for a while. You know why? My entries have always been rejected by this blog over here. Anyway, I thought maybe I should update my blog a bit. So here is the newest testing background. Ok… so it’s all pink and fluff and bunnies. But do I care? Nooo…. You know why? Because this is MY blog. MINE…. Anyway, hahaha…. Hope you like it!

对我说，就是因为爱了你。对我说，你是我的 honey!

frustrating week

Depressing, frustrating weeks

Much to their dismay, the exams are to come. The inevitable test to confirm their existence in the school next year. The teacher gave a bright reassuring smile with piles of notes and worksheets that were ever so encouraging. From the very time of intense studying and late night coffees, their time is to come the next few days.

Monday, a time to arrive in the fresh mood or with the Monday blues to school. Facing stern teachers who fire students down for not doing their homework, no matter how “valid” the excuses are. A little homework placed on the every desks while revision will be freshly gone through tonight.

Tuesday, the time to come with a little fresher look than normal. Books carried to school are ready to be tackled and attacked. However, a little later, the pile of homework gone a little higher and revision is on tonight.

Wednesday, a happy moment to know that the school ends early but boring classes rips the enthusiasm. Another late night of revision.

Thursday, a thin smile on the face and the ever thinning optimism, tackled the day with fiery tempers and multiple coffees. Glaring at teachers who ask questions where nobody can answer. The predictable headache coming up now and then. The midnight oil burns as the slogging through notes begins.

Friday, armed with little books and black eyes with the final strength of the spirit to complete the school week and back to the comfy beds where sleep is called the luxury of exam periods.

AND NOW, THE TESTS BEGIN!

mommy!!!!!

dedicated to my mom

You tore your hair out at me

and then you pester at me to study.

Keeping an eye on me while I am cooped up in my room

breathing the "really" fresh air that i need so much.

That is now.

I remembered last time,

16 years ago,

I wake you up regularly every hour at night,

in a very "polite" manner,

Just because I feel like it.

I know that I am a lucky person to have you.

And for the 17th time that I have to tell you....

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOM!

A memory gladly remembered

Madeleine, Xuan, Alvin and I went over to my two month old house. Yes, I just moved house. We really have fun, but we do miss our dear friend Sherie. Do you know, to see all of them smile is like giving me a thousand priceless gifts. I feel so happy and glad. Why such smiles matters to me so much is a reason of my own. We really have fun. Swimming, joking, laughing and making our own sandwiches. Then we watched INUYASHA!!!!! (I LIKE!!!!!!) And there's a lot of juicy stuff in between. (i think only they know) Anyway, I love this day. It's been a while since I have fun these two days. hahaha.... Yesterday, i went bowling with a another of my best friend. So yup, it's fun too! I like these two days a lot. So I am taking all those in and place them in the treasure chest in my mind and heart. Have fun people. I shall cherish these memories in my heart.

What can I do?

I care about you I really do.

How i really wish that I can be there physically to hold you when you start crying

or maybe just keep you busy for a while.

I really care about you.

Yet, you have taught me a lot of things

It's strange that you are the one who open my eyes and heart.

Everytime, I see you sad, or perhaps, depressed,

I worry for you.

But I can't do much.

Just place a listening year on the phone for you.

I want to cheer you up

or perhaps help you in your problems.

But the problems that you face are in yourself.

I can only give you a shoulder to lean and cry when you need it.

I care about you, I really do.

perhaps some love and care will help you get back and stand

Be strong my dear, I know you can.

Be open to your loved ones and they will understand you.

I will always give you whatever support I can give you.

And God is always there for you if you need him.

Take care my dear.

HAve faith in God and be better soon.

You are always my best friend.

God bless!

yeah sure

I have told them not to do this

but Noooo......

they just don't wish to listen to me


I have told this two to use this thing for safety

but Noooooooo....

they dun wish to listen to me.

I have TRIED to convince them to listen to me....

but NOOOooooo...

They told me toshut up. AND NOW......

Jim and Dim has pop corns all over the sofa because they don't wish to use the bowl.

frustrated

I am cranky, I am moody and I need some time. I need some time to find that will, to find that strength. I need to go stronger. What is with this pressure on me? I know I must study. I am going to get a clear mind. I need it. What is with this habit? What's with this dreaming. Why can't I concentrate?

My dreams
My goals
My hopes

Where are they to motivate me? How do I motivate myself?

Just give me sometime. I need some time. I will give myself a week.

two left in the world

When chaos and violence tears the world we knew apart and left the one world we knew to be lost forever. What do you do?

He grabbed her, hugging her sober sprit as she burst into tears. The pain can never be so great as the two held each other. Nothing was left, absolutely nothing but themselves. There’s no more chirping of birds, the running squirrels or anything alive. Except for the kind old sun that radiates warm energy to them and the four elements that managed to survive the crude world, earth, fire, wind and water. Everything else was silence except the sound of the wind whispering. Barren fields lay on the land with wasted soil. Why does it end that way? And why leave only these two to them.

He held the girl as her tears soaked into his worn shirt as he hugged her. Then, he whispered to her in hopes of comforting her and himself,

“Here I am, this is me,

There’s no one else other than you and me.

Here I am
Just me and you
There’s no one else I rather be……

It’s a new world,
It’s a new start,
It’s a life with the beating of your heart.
It’s a new day,
It’s a new way. I will always love you,
Here I am.”

The girl stopped and stared into his eyes. “Maybe heaven wanted us to do something. Something that is really important. To create a new life, to plant seeds into the ground and leave the rest of the other lives to appear once again. There will be a new world, a world where every living thing will live in harmony, where mistakes can be solved and where happiness and peace is known.”

He cupped his hands on her face,” There’s still hope. We can do this.”

Yes, there’s hope as long as you don’t give up. The girl stopped crying. She took his hands and the both went off, into the barren fields to create life, to carry on hoping.